Moonlight
by Violeta27
Summary: Severus Snape is studying the Dark Arts in the Restricted Section, late at night. He receives an owl carrying a mysterious object. Could it really be her? Rated M for future chapters, just in case!
1. She Brought Him To His Knees

Chapter I – She Brought Him To His Knees.

_In all his life, only one person ever loved him, and he loved her._

Severus Snape was sitting in the restricted section of the library, surrounded by at least six of his usual mystical tomes pertaining to difficult spells, curses and potions. Madame Pince allowed him to frequent the library whenever he pleased, as long as he didn't take any books out and due to lack of social occasions recently, that was almost every waking moment. Although he found night-time to be the best, there were fewer witnesses.

His eyes were hurting and his hand was cramping from so much studying but he continued scribbling furiously. He was halfway through writing out the ingredients and instructions of a potion that allowed the drinker to be invisible for extended periods of time, when a small barn owl softly and silently landed on one of the open books. He ignored it.

After a short while it chirped gleefully at him. He raised his head slowly and his hollow brown eyes regarded the small bird disdainfully. The two stared at each other.

"What?" he asked finally, echoing through the library.

The bird tilted its head unnaturally to the left and looked down. Severus followed its gaze to find a silver bracelet with a letter 'L' charm clutched in its left claw. He recognised it immediately.

It was her.

He lunged at the bird's leg and extracted the charm bracelet impatiently. He held it in his hand, staring at it, the moonlight reflecting the charm on to his face. He closed his fingers around it and it gave his heart an uncomfortable tug. He could feel the warmth of her skin radiating from it, filling him with a sad emptiness that made him sick. The backs of his eyes stung and he shook his head. Sniffing and letting a breath out he realised that the bird was still there, looking at him through beady black eyes.

Severus looked around for a spare piece of parchment, then wrote:

Where?

S

He held it out for the bird, who took it and flew out the window into the night. Severus followed it and watched it disappear into the dark night. It had been a miserably grey, rainy day and a fairly cloudy night but the stars were just starting to peek through.

Severus smiled to himself.

Then his smile fell.

He didn't even know if it was really her. It could be someone playing a hideous trick on him. God knows enough people hated him. He opened his clasped hand. The silver charm had made temporary indents in his palm. Anyone could've stolen it, anyone could be this cruel - to him at least.

His heart sank even lower than it had been the past three months. He'd grown tired of the aching pain in his chest whenever he saw her and the stabbing pain whenever he saw her with him.

Severus Snape had always prided himself on detaching himself from the world, pretending nothing could bother him, like everything just washed off him. When in truth, the only thing he wanted was..

His heart leapt into his throat. The owl was coming back. He watched the small bird grow gradually bigger, it seemed to take forever to arrive.

He held out his hand to the bird but it soared past him and landed back onto the open book of potions again. He ran over to it and took the reply, his heart leapt and fell at the same time:

Where else?

L

It was her writing.

He closed the books, collected his papers and wrote a hurried note of apology to Madame Pince for not replacing the books and as he held the bracelet tightly in his hand, bolted from the library. Severus had never run so fast in his life, not even to escape a jinx or curse. His feet barely touched the floor, he felt like he was flying; which after the torturous twelve weeks he'd endured without her, he could believe it. His heart and head felt lighter than a Hippogriff's feather. He reached the clock-tower courtyard and sprinted through the wooden bridge, his school robes billowing wildly behind him.

He glanced quickly to his left, then stopped suddenly.

There was someone by the water.

He held onto the spindly wooden architecture of the bridge, a bead of sweat collected and ran down his forehead. He wiped it away and squinted to see the figure more clearly, but it was no use. He brought out his wand and pointed it to his eyes.

"Magnifcantus," he muttered.

He felt his eyes begin expanding; they became large, heavy and annoyingly unfocused. He tried his hardest to make sense of the blurriness before his eyes but he couldn't concentrate. He located the person but his eyes were still blurred, he concentrated harder. He saw a thicket of trees, a haze of rippling water, a pale oval flushed with pink and a flash of red.

His breath caught in his chest.

He removed the spell and tore across the rest of the bridge, through the stone circle and raced down the mountain path, past the Whomping Willow and down to the water's edge. She became clearer, her outline, her hair, her body. Severus stopped running and nearly fell, he panted heavily.

She turned to face him. Her green eyes glistened and the moonlight cast a silvery halo on the top of her head.

Severus let out a strangled sigh and felt his eyes begin to tear.

Lily smiled sadly.

"Hello, Severus," she whispered.

He fell to his knees.


	2. He Brought Her To Tears

_**Back for another chapter :)  
>This is complete fic, I'm just uploading in bits.. makes the end that much sweeter, don't you think? I'll upload the final chapter soon, but for now.. enjoy!<strong>_

_**Thank you to all who've subscribed to this story, or favourited myself or the story. It make me feel warm and tingly hehe.**_

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><p>Chapter II – He Brought Her to Tears.<p>

_**She turned to face him. Her green eyes glistened and the moonlight cast a silvery halo on the top of her head.**_

_**Severus let out a strangled sigh and felt his eyes begin to tear.**_

_**Lily smiled sadly.**_

"_**Hello Severus." she whispered.**_

_**He fell to his knees.**_

_**...**_

He stared at the dewy grass, panting, trying to push back the tears that so desperately wanted to come out. He wouldn't cry, not in front of her.

He felt the rain water seep through his school trousers, making his legs wet and uncomfortable, but he didn't move.

She walked towards him, her shadow cast in the grass. He felt her, rather than saw her drop to her knees. Neither of them spoke for a long time, they just knelt together on the soggy grass. He couldn't look at her, he didn't know what that made him. He didn't care.

He held up his closed fist and opened it,

"Here," his voice strained, "I believe this belongs to you."

He felt her take the bracelet, her cold fingertips brushed his warm palm. His eyes closed. Her fingertips traced a small shape in his hand. His jaw tightened.

"You must've been holding this for a while," he heard her smile, "you've got a 'L' imprinted on your palm."

He looked up slightly and saw that she was right.

"So I do." he said dryly.

Out of his peripheral vision he could see that she was wearing a dark blue v-neck jumper and her favourite jeans but she wasn't wearing the pendant he'd won for her any more. He'd won it for her the day the carnival had visited their town, she'd told him Muggles thought the Celtic symbol symbolised witchcraft. She'd wanted it, he got it.

He longed to look at her face but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He breathed slowly and kept his gaze down. He watched her breathe with him, her chest softly rose and fell. He couldn't help but stare at her breasts, firm and pale in the night. They were perfect, she was perfect. Which made his chest ache more.

"What do you want?" he asked, his voice sounded weak.

It took her a moment to answer, she edged closer.

"You" she said.

Severus' head shot up to look at her, he didn't care if he cried. Her face was unsure and frightened and so beautiful it made his gut wrench.

"What?" he said incredulously, "What did you say?"

Her bottom lip trembled and and her eyes began to brim, his chest felt hollow.

"You" she croaked, her voice filled with sadness.

Severus just looked at her, drank her in, let the image of her fill him up. It brought back the childhood memories he'd always cherished. The day she'd come to Spinner's End and they played 'house' in his small room, the time when they'd gone fishing for tadpoles and she'd bought them both ice-creams, the night he'd snuck out his of house and slept over hers when his parents were arguing and they'd practised magic together. She took a shaky breath, tears falling silently down her pink cheeks and she shifted closer to him.

"I've missed you Sev, I've missed you so much." Her bottom lip trembled, more tears fell.

"I've missed you too Lils." God he wanted to touch her, he'd missed her so much.

She whimpered and threw her arms around his neck and wove him upwards into a hug, it took him by surprise but he was glad of it. He wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her close to him, so that she was practically sitting on top of him. He breathed her in deeply, awakening the dark parts of his tortured soul. Lily let out a strangled sob and held him closer.

"I've been so scared Sev, I didn't know what would happen to you, and when I heard them talking I couldn't," she jerked from crying, "I couldn't let them, I couldn't let them do it to you, I can't. I can't. I can't. I couldn't" she repeated muttering this for a while, cradling and nestling herself into the crook of his neck. He could feel her breath warming his neck, its warmth spread to his gut and eased his tension. She inhaled deeply and gave a muffled laugh against his shirt collar.

"You stink of old text books" she laughed as she straightened herself back up slightly.

He let out a short laugh of his own.

"I was in the library when you owled me." he said staring up into her face, smiling. Her eyelashes were sticking together and her eyes were wide and watery. She looked like a porcelain doll.

"I'd guessed that was where you'd be." Lily said nodding slightly, she leant forward and breathed him again. His hands slipped down to her waist, Severus bit his bottom lip. She smelt of roses and moonlight, "You smell like old books and Sandalwood." he could her hear smile, "I've missed the way you smell, you know."

Severus pushed her back and eyes widened his eyes in mock surprise.

"I know," she said, raising her hands in the air, the ends of her jumper catching on her palms, "the amount of times I complained about you reeking of old books and it's one of the things I miss. Bloody typical." she punched him lightly.

"Ow" he complained, laughing indignantly.

She started to giggle into her sleeve-covered palms. Lily's laughter was infectious, he couldn't help but laugh with her. They began sniggering and roaring hysterically. She nearly fell backwards twice from laughing, his grip tightened and pulled her back to him, bumping their noses comically.

He swung his legs around to sit properly, to make sure she wouldn't fall back again. Lily began cackling uncontrollably, what they were actually laughing about Severus couldn't remember but this was the happiest he'd felt in a long time. Actual joy was inscribed all across his face.

After a while, their laughter began to fade to a chuckle, a chuckle faded to an occasional snicker and then it died completely. She rested her hands on his shoulders.

Then, the air seemed to change. Both of them suddenly began to realise the possibly compromising position they were in. Their hug had somehow allowed them to end up with Lily straddling him. And Severus wasn't sure if he liked it or not.

It was odd. He'd fantasised about this, yes, any time he could. He'd thought about her since he was 10 years old and fantasied about her since he was 13. He'd thought about her every second he had to himself, in every position he could think of, including this one. It was perpetual. Still was.

But now that it was actually happening, he wasn't sure if it was right. The Lily in his head was always more than willing to participate in his sexual thoughts, but this Lily, the real Lily, may react differently. Severus looked up at Lily for reassurance. He looked into her eyes and for a split second, thought saw a flicker of something, something more than lingering laughter. Then as quick as it was there, it was gone.

He must've imagined it.

And then he saw it again.

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><p><strong><em>Well. I hope you enjoyed, things are just starting up :)<br>Thanks for reading! RnR for me? Please? _****_The next chapter will up early Friday morning when I get back from work, British time that is. Adjust your watches hehe_**


	3. They Brought Each Other Together Again

**_Ahaa! The wait is over children as I present..  
>*Drum roll*<br>The final chapter :D _**

**_I hope you've enjoyed reading, and I hope you like the ending! _****_Again, I would like to thank ALL of you for favouriting, subscribing and reviewing this fic. It's awesome to hear off all you guys._**

**_Enjoy the chapter!_**

**_And _****_Spy, as always, gotta love yuh babe. _****_Q'UA! *waddles*_**

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><p>Chapter III – They Brought Each Other Together Again.<p>

_**Severus looked up at Lily for reassurance. **__**He looked into her eyes and for a split second, thought saw a flicker of something, something more than lingering laughter. **_

_**Then as quick as it was there, it was gone. Was it there at all?**_

_**He must've imagined it.**_

_**And then he saw it again.**_

…

She sat, straddling him with her arms resting on his shoulders. Her emerald eyes fixed on his lips, her mouth was open and she was breathing heavier than usual.

Severus swallowed. He didn't know what this meant. The amount of times he'd imagined this moment and now it was actually happening, he couldn't believe it. He could feel the tension between them growing, the need and greed of something to be done. He could feel it prickling under his skin. The precious moments before a kiss; where the longing and lust either take over, or ruin everything.

She bit her full, pink bottom lip and furrowed her brow. He could tell she was thinking the same thing; should they risk their friendship for a kiss?

_What friendship? _Said a nasty little voice in his head. _She hasn't spoken to you for 3 months, that's not friendship. It's already been ruined. She ruined it when she abandoned you for that Potter. Well let's see how he likes it. Kiss her._

God how he wanted to listen to that voice. It would give him what he wanted, what he always wanted, the only thing he could dream of wanting. Her.

Lily tilted her head to the side, her hands still resting on his shoulders.

This was it. She was going to kiss him.

She leaned into him, closing her eyes.

Severus tensed, too scared to move.

Lily must've sensed him seize because she straightened her head and swallowed, licking her lips.

"What's the matter?" she sounded worried.

He looked back up into her face, much of it was in shadow. He couldn't think of anything to say. Why had he frozen?

Lily Evans, the girl he'd been in love with for most of his life, was just about to kiss him and he'd ruined it. He swallowed hard and tried to say something but nothing came out. He struggled to the grasp words, to try and explain to her, but he failed.

Lily raised her hands to cup his face, her eyes searching for answers. He watched her, watching him.

The backs of his eyes began to burn, he closed them in an effort to block out the pain. It only made it worse. Hot, burning tears spilled down his cheeks before he could stop them. A sob racked his chest and poured out of his tormented soul. He sat there, with the woman he loved sitting in his lap, and he cried.

She held the back of his head and brought him into her as he sobbed. She held him like she did the night his mother died. The night she tracked him down and stayed with him, comforting him until every sob had been squeezed from his heart. His head flooded with more bitter-sweet memories of them together.

Sitting on the swings as the sun started setting. His twelfth birthday and she'd bought him an eagle feather quill. Standing in the astronomy tower, showing her the star he'd named after her. The first time he saw her face as he watched her behind their tree... and the look on her face when he'd said the worst thing that a wizard, a friend, could say to her. Mudblood.

It was his fault. It was his fault he'd lost her, no one else's. He'd turned against his best friend, the woman he loved. He'd lost her. But now he'd won her back and he wasn't letting go this time.

His fists bunched, clenching her jumper, pulling her closer as his unforgivable tears fell onto her shoulder. His breath was erratic and his vision was blurred, his mind stuck like a broken record, playing the same, heart-breaking memory over and over again.

She held him tightly, her head tucked into their embrace. Her warmth filled him up and allowed him to temporarily forget the pain, until there was only her.

He'd never felt so vulnerable, and so safe at the same time.

She held him until his tears subsided.

He sniffed loudly. Then feeling embarrassed, pulled himself away from her, looking down. Her hand touched his chin and softly pushed upward so she could meet his gaze. She looked into his eyes; he could feel they were red and puffy. She smiled and wiped his cheeks with her sleeves.

"If I'd known that trying kissing you would reduce you to tears, I wouldn't have done it." she joked.

He was mortified, she thought this was because of her.

"Oh god no, it's not you. It's not you- no, never you, you're perfect. It's just I-" he paused, looking into her eyes. "After the way I treated you, I'm getting a second chance to be your friend and I don't want to potentially ruin it by kissing you. I just got you back Lils."

She didn't answer, she just looked at him with a blank expression. A lifetime seemed to pass before she said.

"You think I'm perfect?"

Severus blinked, then nodded.

"I've always thought you were perfect." he admitted.

She tilted her head and smiled.

"Oh, Severus." she sighed and lightly kissed him on the forehead, it spread through his skull. "I don't mean to be the bearer of bad news but," she raised her hands to his face, "you haven't got me back."

His stomach dropped, and the emptiness started seeping its way back in.

"I can't be friends with you," she continued, "I can't forget what you said Sev," she paused, then inched herself closer, so close her lips touched his as she spoke, "but I can try to forgive." she purred.

Suddenly, every fibre in his body was alive, every hair was standing on end. She looked down at him, her beautiful pink lips parted. She held his face as her mouth gently pressed against his, sweet and brief.

He let out a strangled moan, he didn't know if it was from pleasure or frustration, all he knew is he wanted more. But he was scared.

He didn't want to ruin it, he didn't want to pale in comparison to James Potter. He ran his hands down her sides and slid his hands underneath the seam of her jumper. He lightly ran his fingertips around to her back, fanning his fingers outward and brushing against her spine.

She moaned and kissed him again, this time with more force, filled with more passion. Severus was surprised her reaction was so powerful, a deep groan grumbled in his chest and his gut clenched.

Longing and desire welled up inside him, like a balloon ready to burst. He went hard as stone, his erection throbbing. He pressed his palms tightly against the smooth contours of her back, moulding her body to his as she fed him open-mouthed kisses, gently sliding her tongue in and out his mouth.

Her hands never stopped moving; from his face to his neck, to his shoulders and down his arms and back up. He moaned and grabbed the back of her auburn hair, holding her tighter to him. He was so turned on, she was better than any fantasy he'd had of her.

She slid her hands up his to his head and ran her fingernails through his hair, sparking electricity through his scalp. She pulled on his hair gently and ran her hands through it, soothing and stirring at the same time. His desire pulled him further, he could feel his erection painfully pressing into his button-fly, he felt as though he was about to explode. He kissed her more ferociously, carnal.

If she was his, only for this brief moment, he wasn't going to waste it. A feminine moan escaped from her lips as she dove deeper into the kiss. She raised herself up, squeezing her thighs. Her movements rubbed sensuously against his erection, bringing him dangerously close to the edge. Breaking the kiss, he yelped in pleasure. He didn't know how much longer he could last.

She'd positioned herself higher and he could feel the warmth of her against his cock, she was as aroused as he was. He looked at her, his eyes felt heavy and his brain felt like it was filled with air.

She was looking down. Suddenly, it felt like he was dowsed in cold water.

"What's the matter?" he asked her. She shook her head lightly.

"I can't do this" she said, quite breathlessly. "I can't do this to James."

His anger began to bubble. He hated she fact she called him 'James' now. Before it was 'Potter' or 'The Arrogant Toe-rag', or during a heated rant she'd created his favourite 'The Arrogant Toe-rag of Arrogant Toe-ragged-ness'. That one still made him smile, sometimes but not now.

She raised her head sadly.

"I'm sorry Sev." she said, and all his anger evaporated. The bubbling disappeared as quick as it had started.

Her eyes were glazed and her lips were full and pink and so very kissable. God he wanted to kiss her again. His erection seemed to agree.

He pulled the back of her neck and jerked his head to kiss her again. She was willing, but hesitant. Her once untameable passion had gone. He kissed her, as she'd kissed him. And she kissed him back.

She rubbed herself gently against him, causing friction in his trousers. Pleasure tingled all over his body, and he smiled. He kissed her and smiled. This was everything he'd ever wanted, everything he'd ever wished to have.

And it was going to have to end, he knew it. He'd have to tell her that it was so late to save him, to save them. The brand was still tender, burning on his forearm. There was no turning back from his vows.

For this, she'd never forgive him.

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><p><span>EPILOGUE<span>

_Many years had passed, and not a moment went by that he didn't think of Lily._

_He missed her always,_

_He loved her always._

_Once they'd parted after their unintentional passionate affair, they'd never spoken about it again._

_But following that, they'd stayed secret friends. A surreptitious smile in the corridor, a subtle wave during feasts, an inconspicuous counter-curse during a fight._

_Severus never stood in the way of James and Lily, although he did enjoy hexing him for fun. _

_He knew that she loved him, and he didn't want to keep her from happiness. _

_Even if that meant losing her to another man._

_After Hogwarts, she married James and he'd joined Voldemort. _

_Separate paths; just like she'd said._

_He never did tell her that he'd joined Voldemort at such an early age._

_He didn't want to. He knew what it would do to her._

_In hindsight, revenge seemed so trivial._

_If he could go back, he'd have chosen differently._

_He would have chosen Her._

_He'd never stopped loving his friend, his best friend._

_He'd love her. __**Always.**_

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><p><strong><em>There :) I hope you all enjoyed. Oh, god, I hope you all enjoyed :_**

**_RnR and let me know what you thunk._**

**_Again, last time.. Thank you all for reading :D_**


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